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 Application by Agathon

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Agathon

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Posts : 3
Join date : 2016-08-24
Age : 16
Location : No.

PostSubject: Application by Agathon   Wed Aug 24, 2016 2:54 am

Steam Name: |EUPRP| Agathon
Steam ID: STEAM_0:1:65093554
Steam Profile Link: http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198090452837/
Age: 15
Rp Experience: Almost a year (About 6-7 months I believe)
How did you stumble upon our server?: Being part of EUPRP I've come to know about this server and even came into contact with staff members and befriended them (Arglack, Humpy)
Tell me a cool Mass Effect Fact: Bullets spread on impact, dealing more damage to the target and also affecting a wider area

Character Name: Zaelo'Nilas nar Sehala
Character Race: Quarian
Why did you choose this race?: Quarians seem interesting enough to me that you can make them have any kind of personality, there isn't really a big stereotype for a Quarian other than "suit-rat".
Age:  21
What can your character do for our ship? (Muscle, Maintenance, Triggerman, Comedic Act, etc.): Technologically advanced, knowledge of ships and ship infrastructure, experienced in combat technology
Character Equipment: Enviro-Suit, M-5 Phalanx, M-23 Katana
Moral Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Strengths: Advantage against AI or Synthetics (Tech powers using omni-tools such as AI Hacking, Overload, Shield drain, standard Engineer powers) Quick in movement
Weaknesses: Weakened Immune System (Being a Quarian), Lower Physical Strength
Character Backstory a.k.a. how or why are you here (One paragraph minimum, be creative!):

Zaelo'Nilas is a Quarian who had found life to be troubling to people of his kind once his Pilgrimage had started. He was born aboard the Sehala, his parents were Lili'Tulon nar Shukor (Mother) and Nalo'Vaen vas Ragro (Father). In his earlier years among the Migrant Fleet and Sehala, he had lived his life working on and learning all he could about ships and technology, as well as Geth and Artificial Intelligence. His parents did not get along well after his birth, Zael has been forced to drown out the arguments and familial issues and focus on growing up and readying himself for his Pilgrimage. His parents had given him attention and love, but it felt more forced to him and less of a truth. Zael hadn't communicated that much with others, he didn't enjoy the crowds, and didn't appear to get along very well with the other Quarians aboard. He kept more to himself as he had around his parents, hoping to increase his technological skills and knowledge. When the day finally came for him to leave the Flotilla and enter his Pilgrimage, he was eager to leave the crowds and animosity from his parents. He decided to wander, trying to find a place that he would fit into, although things hadn't ended well for him.

He traveled to places such as the Citadel, tried Illium, though staying away from Omega for a while. He had hoped to bring back something extraordinary in tech, but didn't know where to look. However, as he had spent time among other species, his viewpoints on his people had changed, as well as his views on others. Being a Quarian, he was quickly put under scrutiny, being called a "Suit-Rat" in whispers behind his back whenever he entered, being hassled by C-Sec, and being denied passage to Illium. He started to grow desperate, wanting to return to life among the flotilla, but came to a conclusion that he would not return, as they had forced him out into a life where he had been hassled and treated poorly by others. Plus, he did not care much for the flotilla or his ship as he had spent most of his time alone anyway, and he didn't feel a need  to obtain a very valuable item to help out his ship captain who he had little care for.

He figured that a life alone would fit him more, but he wouldn't be able to achieve that without a way to earn some wealth. He didn't care what others had thought of him, and he figured he wanted some payback for what he has been put through and hassled for, so he went looking in the smuggling department, and eventually came into contact with the Geisha. The ship had sparked his interest, and he decided that he wished to join. Before attempting to join, however, he knew he would need to learn more about combat to increase his survival chance, as well as making sure he wouldn't die from a suit rupture or infection. He had used the gifts he received upon departure to go to shooting ranges, and purchase upgrades to his suit and equipment. after he was sure he was ready, he performed research on the Geisha and affiliates of the Geisha, and found the Syndicate. He came into contact with them, and was able to send a request to join the crew to the captain of the ship.

Side note: I'm very willing to change any details about this character that would not make sense.


Last edited by Agathon on Thu Aug 25, 2016 1:22 am; edited 4 times in total
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BabyButterJesus

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Join date : 2016-08-19
Age : 15
Location : Denmark.

PostSubject: Re: Application by Agathon   Wed Aug 24, 2016 3:57 pm

I'm certainly not an admin, but I do have a suggestion. Meaby format the backstory into paragraphs? Making it a brick wall of text makes it hard to read.
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Agathon

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PostSubject: Re: Application by Agathon   Wed Aug 24, 2016 6:05 pm

Yeah, fair enough. Just updated it, it's a weird little habit I have when it comes to writing. Maybe it'll be a little easier on the eyes now.
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Filtershakes

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PostSubject: Re: Application by Agathon   Thu Aug 25, 2016 12:33 am

Weakened immune system is an inherent trait of the species and not specific to the character- unless their immune system is weak in comparison to other quarians.

How does he have an advantage against synthetic/AI characters?

Also, you do know that quarians are one of the more fragile species in the Mass Effect setting, and thus cant take much damage? Just making sure, as you've applied for them to be a combat character it seems.

And for quarian stereotypes, the other one is Tali knock-off.

The 'Abandoned the flotilla during pilgrimage/exiled from flotilla/not born on flotilla trait is, ironically, a common one despite being rare in the setting. It's also a trait I feel is often used for no reason other than to try and make a character pointlessly stand out. (Having them still on their pilgrimage gives them an immediate story/quest to try and go on, even if they never accomplish it during the course of the server. Quarians pilgrimages can take as long as they feel it needs to take to find something of value to bring back to the fleet) I'm not accepting or denying it, but I am saying in it's current form I do not support this character. If another admin accepts the app, I won't have any issues though! Smile
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Agathon

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Age : 16
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PostSubject: Re: Application by Agathon   Thu Aug 25, 2016 1:14 am

I added more descriptions to the strengths and weaknesses, and I'll go ahead and respond to the other things.

Yes, I'm aware that Quarians are very fragile compared to other species, though I know that there's workarounds, and his suit can be upgraded to have strengthened shields or even armored plating, I've seen it done before (I think reinforced material works as well, if I'm not mistaken). However, this character is more specialized for combat than in ships, that's just knowledge he has since it comes with being a Quarian.

I didn't really care too much about Quarian stereotypes in all honesty, I just wanted to give him a backstory that I felt fit as to why he would join the Geisha crew.

Surprisingly enough, I don't plan on making this character stand out in a way, I was actually thinking something like this: I've mentioned how he was seclusive and a loner most of the time in the backstory, and was thinking that over time aboard the Geisha he would develop and maybe build upon those traits or become more social. Thanks for the feedback, though! (Will most likely add a bit more to the backstory and straighten things out a little more)
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Arglack

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PostSubject: Re: Application by Agathon   Thu Aug 25, 2016 1:51 pm

After reading the app, it's actually a decent one, and I think that quarian players are well aware that they are very fragile.

looks good to me

Accepted
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